Fighting Stinkers bad - burgers good

By Tracy Farr
Editor, The Daily Spittoon

Stinker fans come to Friday night football games for two reasons:  One, because they believe someday the team will win and they don't want to miss the blessed historical event. And two, to enjoy a Fighting Stinker Booster Club flame-grilled hamburger with all the fixings.

"For $6 you can get a ticket for a so-so seat at Stinker Stadium," said long-time Stinker fan Bob Greeley, "but for $3.50 you can have the best cheeseburger in town, in the whole state, and probably all of America.  They are absolutely, positively the best."

At home games, the line of fans going to the concession stand usually snakes around for hundreds of yards hours before the game even begins. And fans are not shy to admit they are there for one thing only -- the burgers.

"I've been coming to these games for 27 years and the burgers are getting better and better," said Jeffrey Stimple.  "If it wasn't for these hamburgers, probably no one would be here.  I know I wouldn't."

And what makes the Fighting Stinker hamburger so great?  To find out, we asked the person who is in charge of the grill -- Booger Thompson, owner of Booger's Burgers.

"First off, your meat has to be fresh," Thompson said.  "We don't use no store-bought, processed, made-in-China meat. No sirree! The meat we use tonight was standing out in somebody's field yesterday chewing its cud.  Tonight we may call it a Stinker Burger, but yesterday somebody was calling it Bessy or Bossy or some other silly cow name."

Thompson has been volunteering his time to cook Stinker Burgers for 17 years.  He says he believes in giving back to the community

"Booger's Burgers wouldn't be where it is today if it wasn't for our friends and neighbors right here in Stinky Creek," Thompson said.  "If I can help our Stinkers by keeping the stands full, then I believe I've made a difference -- and in the end, making a difference is what it's all about."

The Fighting Stinkers played the Woodchucks this past Friday and lost 47 to 3.  The athletic booster club, on the other hand, made more than $1,000 on hamburgers alone. 

The Stinkers play the Ravens this coming Friday at Raven Field.  Fans traveling to the game are advised to grab a Booger Burger to take with them.  The Raven concession stand just sells Wal-mart hotdogs.