The pencils are finally here!

By Tracy Farr
Editor, The Daily Spittoon

Yes, friends and neighbors, now is the time for all good men -- and women, children and stray dogs -- to be on the lookout for the town council's newest public relations gimmick -- Stinky Creek pencils.

The neon-colored pencils arrived in town Wednesday and are already being circulated around the county.

"This is the best advertising plan our town has ever participated in," council woman Caroline Bratt said.  "These pencils are already turning heads, and that's what we were after."

According to Bratt, the public-relations strategy is for council members on annual "fact-finding vacations" to "accidentally" leave the pencils at truck stops, waffle houses, hotels, gas stations, malls, amusement parks, donut shops, swimming pools, schools, libraries and Mexican restaurants across the United States. 

Denny Grouper was the only person on the council not to vote for the spending of money for the pencils, but since seeing them, he has changed his mind.

"At first I thought it was a stupid idea," Grouper said,  "but I've already passed out a few pencils, and the smiles I've gotten have been well worth the price we paid.  I don't hesitate to admit that I was wrong."

According to Bratt, hits on the Stinky Creek website are already starting to increase.

"We used to get about 10 to 15 hits a day on our website and now we're averaging around 17," Bratt said. "More hits mean more people are finding out about our town, and that means more business for area businesses.  So, yes, the pencils have been well worth it."

The town council is planning on purchasing more pencils in the future and possibly inserting mini GPS units in them to see how far they travel away from Stinky Creek.

"It would be wonderful to see our pencils make it all the way to places like Juneau, Alaska, or even London," Bratt said.  "Who knows -- maybe one day the Russians will take our pencils up into space.  Wouldn't that be a blast!"