The Spit

Spittoon Features

Front Page
I'm Just a Guy
Archives
Bus No. 6
Stinky Creek Airport

The Daily Spittoon is updated every Monday morning before the entire staff heads over to the Stinky Creek Saloon for lunch. If you have any complaints, don't interrupt us while we're eating. Just send us an email.

Send all
comments to
The Management.

Thieves try to steal grandma's purse

By Tracy Farr
Editor, The Daily Spittoon

Two thieves recently tried to snatch the purse of a 67-year-old grandmother as she came out of Hank's Department Store, and Sheriff Max Welter is asking for help from any Stinky Creek residents who may have witnessed the crime.

Eva Grant was leaving Hank's after shopping for birthday presents for her grandsons when the two thieves ran up from behind, grabbed her oversized fake leather gold-colored purse, dragged it for about 10 feet, then dropped it. Grant called for help, but the thieves were gone in a flash.

"Luckily they weren't strong enough to make off with the purse," Welter said. "This is one instance where having everything plus the kitchen sink inside of a purse really helped."

According to Grant, the purse contained the following items: a bottle of water, chewing gum, writing tablets, pens and pencils, hairbrushes, a pair of scissors, a ratchet set, three hack saw blades, extra shoelaces, sun tan lotion, a package of Band-Aids, cold-weather gloves, two watches, a sewing kit, an emergency blanket, a camouflage hunting telescope, a duck call, a filet knife, and a small cooking set.

"I know I probably carry more than I need to, but I have four grandsons," Grant said. "Always being prepared is not an option for me -- it's a necessity."

Residents are asked to be on the lookout for two male individuals, about medium height and not very muscular, possibly hunched over from straining their backs.

"It's hard to believe that people can be so callous as to try to steal something from a grandmother," Welter said. "We're going to catch these two individuals, and when we do, they're going to get what's coming to them."

If you have any information about this crime, please call Sheriff Welter at his office. You don't have to give your name, and the sheriff promises not to look at his caller ID.


	The Official Newspaper of Stinky Creek, Texas