Super-Duper Tuesday Party set

By Tracy Farr
Editor, The Daily Spittoon

Crappie County residents and friends are invited to the Super-Duper Tuesday Masquerade Party to be held at the Stinky Creek Saloon, Tuesday, starting at 5 p.m.  Everyone is encouraged to dress like their favorite presidential candidate.

"Stinky Creekians are serious about presidential elections," Mayor Herbert Reese said, "but we also like to have a bit of fun with it.  Our Super-Duper Tuesday Masquerade Party is going to be super-duper."

According to Bud Henderson, owner of the saloon, five Panasonic 42-inch widescreen plasma HD TVs, each one tuned to a different station, will be set up in order for partygoers to catch every minute of primary action.

"Some people like FOX and can't stand ABC.  Others like CNN and C-SPAN," Henderson said.  "With the five TVs, everybody will get to watch the primaries the way they want to watch it."

As partygoers arrive, they will be asked to vote for who they think will dominate the primaries, who they think will drop out of the race next, and whose spouse will be the most obnoxious.

"Four years ago Henry Thames was voted the most obnoxious spouse," Henderson said.  "His wife, Beth, was really embarrassed, and we hope he doesn't do anything like that again."

Door prizes will be given away for Best Costume, Best Candidate Impersonation, as well as Best "There Goes My Candidacy Flushing Down The Toilet" Sound Effect.

All partygoers are asked to refrain from throwing popcorn at the TVs.  It took Bud Henderson three days to pick up the mess last time, and he would prefer not to have to do it again.

For more information about the Super-Duper Tuesday Masquerade Party, call someone who knows.